Donnerstag, 8. April 2010

Be afraid!

If you are afraid of being afraid - let it be. There´s a long story behind this whole being afraid of something - thing (and don´t be afraid, I will not talk bout evolution much). I´m not talking bout the fear of a predator or the fear of a war. I´m talking about the pure feeling "fear", which can not be described until, well, until you are feeling it. It´s shocking and in most cases it crawling up your neck until it gets you.

First case: Diploma. Man! We were afraid, weren´t we!? Hell yes! This fear was one of those creeping, slowly crouching fears, that get you harder and harder every day until that one that, on which it seems to explode and - AND NOW COMES THE IMPORTANT PART - fade away. It ALWAYS turns to dust in the wind, to sparkling star powder or to whatever you wanna call "NOTHING". And here comes, what we should learn about this: Fear is necessary and it actually helps you.

Man, I would definitely haven´t learned so freaking much, if i would not been so afraid of this damn exam. It´s not only that I have learned more. I was more concentrated, I woke up earlier to start to work or to learn and I focused on only one thing (which is in my case nearly impossible!). I felt like DATA from Star Trek. Honestly. There was only this one exam. Nothing else. Pretty strange for a person, that has 10 projects aside, 50 people who´d love to drink a beer with you and 100 song ideas every minute.
So what I have learned about this whole fear thing. "Anscheißen is manchmal ziemlich wichtig!"
I´ll try to translate this: I´m sure there will be many "fear" situations in my life. And I will react exactly the same as I did in the fear situation before. And guess what: thats good! This is what makes me better (at least in those situations).

Then there is this other fear situation. The moment you fear for your life or the life of someone else. It sucks. I know. It sucks so hard, that I can not write any positive thing about it BUT the moment after the fear. Think of somebody who survived a critical moment. How happy have you been!? How much more could you enjoy your life and your moments with this person!? Fear suddenly turns into something very, very strong. An Energy, that powers you up (Man - I´m in my video games world know how I am).

Long story short: Some feelings or moments need to be survived to become a better person.

No pictures for this one...

1 Kommentar:

PixelProspector hat gesagt…

you've managed to convert the fear into something productive. you focused your powers on your goal and you were afraid of failing but i think inside of you you knew that when you work hard enough it all will pay off. and it did...
by fighting the fear and working towards your goal you grew.
some kind of transistion so to speak.
wish you all the best man.
keep it up :)